29 November 2019

Adulthood Boundary


To Iva Kassabova,
for the help
and the provided idea

“Come on, relax. Leave the work aside, it is not going any place!” – Yassen stretched, patted her hair and leaned back as he spread his arms on the back of the bench. – “Take it easy, there will always be vexation.”
“Well but I’m the one who will be blamed if I can’t finish the brochures on time.”
“Why not to finish them? You’re good, it will work. And that client of yours, what’s your fault if he did not bring the logo on time.”
“Explain it to my boss!”
“Just to finish my coffee and I’m going.”
“Stop it!” – the woman laughed. – “Show some respect to my problems.”
“I have respect to you, not only to your problems.”
“Come on, now, conversationalist.”
“Do you doubt about that, Nelly?”
Before she could say anything, the man jumped, passed between the tables of the café, crossed the street and came back with a big, aiming to the sky red balloon in no time.
 “Crazy man!” – the woman laughed but she felt extremely pleased. – “Do you know how long it was since I’ve been gifted with balloons?”
“Are the men so blind?”
“Obviously” – she answered and it seemed to him that she blushed slightly. – “And now, what am I going to explain to the office when I come back with a balloon?”
“To hell with them! You’ll explain nothing.”
“You just think so.”
Nelly looked at her wristwatch.
“It’s time for me to go. My lunchbreak is over, even I’m going to be late.”
“I’m coming with you. I have no more job for today so I’m going to tell you jokes for a good mood while you are fighting your brochures.”
“Ha... no way!”
“Do you think I’ve run out of jokes?”
“The superiors will clap their hands for joy.”
“The superiors, if they know it much, will be slapped by me.”
“Stop it or I’ll slap you.”
“Oh! Yes! Beat me, harsh mistress! I’m ready to do anything for you!” – he yelled out at her.
 “Yassen! Behave yourself! You’re twenty-seven” – she silenced him half-jokingly and looked around to see if anyone was not looking at them.
“Well, I won’t do it anymore but you should get rid of some of your forties and let yourself play.”
“I’ll kill you. I’m thirty-six.”
“I know, I know, I’m only joking” – the man laughed.
He paid the bill and extended a helping hand to let her go out of the narrow room between the bench and the table. He put his bright-grey jacket on the dark-blue short-sleeved blouse, took the keys of the Audi out of his jeans pocket and when he opened the door of the car, she stopped and laughed:
 “I cannot take the balloon with me to work. I’ll let it fly freely and tell people there are still romantic men.”
“And women who deserve it” – Yassen smiled.
“Shall I see you tomorrow?” – he asked while driving to her office.
“I don’t know... Call me in the morning. If I can go out at lunchbreak, I’ll see you.”
“I thought about to see you after you finish work. To go for a meal somewhere.”
“Well... no... you know it’s hard to me after work” – Nelly sighed.
“OK, point taken, darling” – the man smiled.

She had spent all the afternoon in rows with her boss because of a mistake made by a colleague of hers who had managed to purge and moreover, to set her up. She had gotten nervous because of the client’s delay but while she was travelling home on the crowded bus, she had calmed down. Her thoughts were going back to Yassen who could always find a way to cheer her up and to make her feel a bit far from the grayness of everyday life. She felt young, even younger than him when they were together but meanwhile, she had been asking herself where that adventure would take her. She liked him but if the age difference did not bother her, it made her feel somehow particularly; she was afraid he could feel fed up of her because of her restrictions. But when they were together, she felt so well! She had not felt the gallant attention of a man who did not overload her with his problems for a long time. She went out of her drowsy thoughts when the bus drew near her stop. “It is what it is. We’ll see” – Nelly said to herself and made her way to the door.
She got down the bus, took her phone out and called her daughter. She had instructed her to do the shopping in order to get rid at least of one obligation but as she could expected it, her fifteen-year-old teenage-girl had done nothing. She passed through a few shops, hardly reached the doorbell but nobody answered it. She tried to take the key out of her purse trying not to drop any of the plastic bags.
 “Can’t you hear me ringing?” – she asked her husband who had leaned back in front of TV watching the news.
“No, I can’t. Don’t you have a key but you ring?” – he turned his head.
“I have a key as well as bags to bring because here, nobody can do anything!”
“But Silvy was supposed to do the shopping, wasn’t she?” – he said.
“Have you ever seen her do it? At least, you could make her do it” – she went to the kitchen with the bags.
“I don’t follow her all the time. What am I supposed to do when you’ve spoiled her totally?”
“Of course, it’s my fault!” – Nelly snapped at him.
“Mom, where’s the hair gel?” – Silviya appeared at the door wearing gossamer bustier and unbuttoned jeans.
“Wait and see a gel! Couldn’t you go to the shop?”
“I didn’t have any time left.”
“Ah, because I have plenty of time!”
“Oh, leave me alone! I’m fed up to be hated by everybody!” – the girl turned around and snapped the door of her room.
“Come on, stop yelling, you two!” – the man raised his voice.
“I am also fed up, fed up to feed you all!” – Nelly yelled after her and went to change her clothes.
She took her mobile out of her bag to hear it if it would ring and saw she got a message. She sat at the bed and read: “And after all, think about a cozy dinner.”
“I’m definitely going to think some” – Nelly said to herself. – “Even, there’s nothing to think about, see you after work... darling.” A smile appeared on her face.

“Even, there’s nothing to think about, see you after work... darling :)” – Yassen read on the screen and leaned back pleased.
“Stop it! Did you find another chick” – Peter tapped on his shoulder, leaned on the pier, coated in rattan, by the counter top and the subdued light of the pipes of the wall lamp lit vertically his short hair.
“Wow, no mercy!” – Nikolay added. – “Pete, let’s put ourselves together, because this one will leave nothing for us.”
“Stop it!” – Yassen smiled, put the phone back in the case on the belt and put the edge of his leather jacket above. – “A person cannot find a chick because of you.”
“How’s that one, bro? You’ve worn up the screen because of those messages.”
“You can do it too but who’s that chick that would answer to retarders as you?”
“Don’t play smart because if you come with this lady, you’ll leave alone, you know.”
“Believe in yourself! She’s a woman of taste” – Yassen waved at the waitress for three more beers.
“You’d better say where you found her” – Peter was curious.
“She’s great. She works in a company where I had some job to do. She works something on a Photoshop, some kind of brochures, advertising matters, stuff like that. The secretary was out and while I was waiting for the boss, we started talking. Then, when I went to negotiate the contract conditions, we met again, we had some coffee and... that’s it.”
“Good for you! And how long?” – Nikolay turned around on his chair.
“Well, for about three weeks.”
“Stop talking and tell us how she is in bed” – Peter pushed him from the other side.
“Hey, asshole! That’s why you cannot keep a normal woman by your side. You need some finesse, bro!” – Yassen winged him on the back of his neck. – “It’s not a twenty-year-old drunk bustard in the disco.”
“How old is she?” – Nikolay raised his eyebrows.
Yassen took a breath and said:
“Thirty-six.”
His friends’ laughter silenced the music coming from the speakers on the bar.
“Stop it!” – Peter was about to spill his beer. – “Oh, no... You’re killing me” – he was giggling.
“The boy wanted a MILF?” – Nikolay kept cackling, rubbing his eyes with the back of his hand.
“OK, keep giggling but your tarts are nothing compared to her” – Yassen smirked.
A new burst of laughter shook the men.
“Couldn’t you catch something... oh... younger?”
“A mom’s boy!”
“Pete, let’s prepare his ad for a matchmaking site, because we’re gonna lose him!”
 “Dude” – Yassen kept smirking. – “Even without ads, I’m way ahead of the curve.”
“Especially having in mind the curve’s age” – the rest of them kept giggling.
“Listen to me, Yassen, I don’t know what’s wrong with you, but pull yourself together” – Peter said in a while. – “I don’t know how that woman addled your wits but give her one if you have a pain in the ass and don’t get yourself in a state.”
“We’ll see.”
“But you’re seriously into that chick!”
“I wouldn’t go so far...”
“It’s your business, pal” – Nikolay raised his beer. – “It’s important there are women. Cheers.”

A half an hour before the end of the workday, Nelly started packing up.
“Katy, the boss, isn’t in. I’ll leave the office earlier” – she whispered to her only colleague who was her close friend.
“Where are you off to?” – the woman looked at her and felt the freshly put perfume. – “You’re so shiny?” – she smiled mischievously.
“Mmm... stuff like that” – Nelly took her bag and went down the corridor energetically.
“There’s something in here” – her colleague jumped and ran after her. – “Who, who, who is he?”
“Nothing serious.”
“Ah, you can’t fool me! I see – you’ve been more cheerful lately” – the two women entered the toilet room and made sure that they were alone. – “Is he cool?”
“He’s handsome...”
“Come on! He was “handsome”...” – her friend pushed her shoulder.
“Well, he’s one meter and eighty-five centimeters tall, with heavy hands, with a well-built, taut body, short, wavy, brown hair; he’s a casual kind of man, a joker, with a good sense of humor, and most of all, tidy. A handsome man...”
Katy perked up and took her hand in her hands.
“You’re killing me! With a good sense of humor, taut body... Where did you find him, Nelly?”
“We’ve just met.”
“Aha! And where can I meet such a handsome man? Tell me something more, please!”
“Now, I have no time. I’m late.”
“Is he married?” – Katy squinted again.
“No, he isn’t” – Nelly answered nasally while she was putting her lipstick on.
“And how old is he?”
Nelly laughed silently, put the lipstick back in her purse, turned around and looked at her colleague’s eyes:
“He’s twenty-seven.”
Katy muted but she pulled herself together quickly.
“Are you mad? Those are nine years of age difference!”
“Benefiting me” – Nelly winked and went to the door.
Katy stayed concerned with her hand on her wrist, and the other one on her forehead.
“You’re killing me... and what do you think you’ll get out of it?”
“I don’t know... wait and see. I’m late. Bye.”
“Mad, mad, mad... good luck!” – her friend yelled after her.

The restaurant was not big but it was exquisite and the most important – it was sheltered and not very famous because it was the thing that had bothered Nelly most of all. There was no way to meet somebody of her environment there; moreover – Yassen had chosen a table in the corner, hidden behind an enormous plant and a thick pillar, covered in dark paneling. He had waited for her in his car with a refined, fragrant rose two blocks away of her office but he had not told her where they were going till the last moment.
The cozy atmosphere, the light, delicious food and wine had made her relax and, slightly dizzy, Nelly had laughed wholeheartedly at Yassen’s jokes who had proved the first impression of being an incomparable gentleman. He himself had drunk nothing but a small brandy with the coffee after the fruit salad. He was sitting leaned back and his wide-open eyes, he admired her, made her slightly thrill.
“How are you?”
“I haven’t felt like that for a long time” – the woman confessed.
“I’m glad you feel well” – Yassen was smiling. – “That makes me feel good, too.”
“It was a really nice evening” – she smiled, too.
“Was? Why “was”? I hoped it hadn’t been over yet.”
“What do you have in mind?”
“I thought we could continue somewhere. In some club or piano-bar... or we might figure out something else...” – the man leaned forward, slightly slid his hand over the table and covered her fingers.
Nelly shivered, she wanted to pull her hand back but something made her stop.
“What... well, I don’t... I don’t know” – she stumbled.
“You don’t know or you don’t want? Wouldn’t you be pleased?”
“No... in contrary” – she could not believe she had said it – “but I, can you understand me...”
“Are you in a hurry? Come on...” – Yassen insisted. – “Would you lose something by enjoying a refined to its end evening?”
“No, of course not...”
“Then what? You’re a big girl” – the man took her palm between his hands. – “I feel calmly when I’m with you, you feel in the same way when you’re with me. I know you like me not less than I’m mesmerized by you... but you’re uptight by your lifestyle loop. You’ve told me about that. I know that it’s so. You’re missing tenderness... let me set you free.”
Nelly was shivering from inside. She hoped that he could not feel that. She did not want the night to be over but she worried.
“Let’s do it like this: we’ll get into the car and you’ll tell me where to drive. I’ll either drive you home or we’ll go somewhere, or I’ll invite you to my place...”
They went out in the cool night without saying a word. The little unlit street was silent and it was the first time when the woman had thanked to the darkness. She sat in the car almost automatically, the man closed the door after her and passed from the other side. She was sitting silently, looking at her. He did not touch her, he did not move, he was waiting. The woman was looking out, then she bent her head, sighed, looked at him and smiled:
“Alright...”

“It was fantastic” – she whispered and she really thought so.
She was lying cuddled up on his shoulder, feeling his rapid heartbeats and she felt as if his world had stayed somewhere far, in another dimension. She had not felt anything like that for years and she did not know if she would experience such a night again.
“You’re fantastic” – the man kissed her tenderly.
He was happy, full of energy, strong and cheerful. He was caressing the woman by him slowly, having hugged her as if he wanted to protect her from the entire world.
“What are we going to do... I don’t want it to be over...”
“Why should it be over?” – the man smiled.
“You know what my state is. I could barely go out.”
“I know it though I want to have you every night, every morning to feel the warmth of your skin...”
“It’s impossible” – the woman sighed.
“Never say die!”
“How do you imagine it?”
“Imagine what?”
Nelly leaned on her elbow and looked into his eyes.
“Yassen, I have a child who I’ll never set apart from. Even if we leave aside everything else, how do you think you’re going to take care for a fifteen-year-old teenage?”
“In general, why not?” – the man raised his eyebrows. – “You think I can’t manage? We’re going to become friends and that’s it.”
“She is stubborn even now, she’s oversexed, changes her moods constantly, she’s willful... how do you imagine that you can become friends? You’ll see the world upside down!”
“The important thing is to be together, Nelly.”
“You have no idea what puberty is.”
“Well, yes, but not a big deal, everything will be fine” – Yassen waved his hand.
Nelly was looking at his eyes, then she smiled, caressed him and whispered:
“Maybe.”
She stood up and started putting her clothes on.
“I have to go.”
“I am coming to give you a drive” – he jumped.
“No, I’ll take a taxi. I prefer not taking the risk to let my husband see me. You’ll have to stop away of my block of flats and I don’t want to walk in the dark.”
Yassen sat on the bed again.
“OK. When will I see you again?”
“I don’t know. I’ll hear from you soon.”

Nelly was sitting in the taxi looking out of the taxi-window. She felt sad but meanwhile – bright. She was thinking about her experience with Yassen, about how much she had wanted to be with him but she realized it would lead nowhere edifying. He was too young and though he was a good man, he had never changed diapers, he had never been over the moon because of the child’s first step, he had never worried about a cold, he had never been in a hurry for school, he had never cared about till late, looking at the clock. He could not understand what all that was. She was grateful for that only magical night but she realized there could never be a second one.

~~~~~~~~~
Translated by: Vessislava Savova

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